When you love her…


Love is a language we all speak. It is universal. It is visceral. It gives us a sense of significance. But a love misunderstood with ego destroys a life of purpose.

I was once a boy. I was once in love. And I was attached to the feelings. It was addictive. It was self-centered. It was unquenching. It was a zig and zag road. My entire existence I have mistaken it for truly loving. It was painful. It was dull. And it was unnecessary.

When you love, it is about giving. It is self-sacrificing. Emotion is not the basis of your commitment. It is not about what you can receive, but always about what you can offer.

Do you love her or are you just in love with her?

When you love her, conversations flow easily and naturally. You are yourself. There is no pretension. It is one of the things that you look forward to every single day. Talking to her is like conversing to yourself. Your eyes illuminate the feelings that words fall short.

When you love her, you do not put her in charge of your happiness. Though undoubtedly true that she makes you feel happy, you know that she is not the one in charge of it. This is to say that she will not be at fault when life leads the road downside. You know that life is a tide of emotions, and you chose to sail every bit of wave with her.

When you love her, you are not afraid to let her go. You do not want to own or control her. You are not an emotional baggage. To you, she is a flower you will tend to in every season until she blossoms into her full potential. To you, she is the most beautiful flower in the garden. And you don’t pick the flower because you have a gorgeous vase. Because in the garden, the flower belongs.

When you love her, you don’t beg for more. More time. More attention. You realized that yearning for more is like chasing a mist. You can never get there. It can never be satisfied. You simply give the undivided time and attention that each moment with her deserves.

When you love her, she does not become your world. Your existence does not suddenly measure up to wanting, needing or pleasing her. Your world stays the same yet different. You respect her uniqueness. You respect those moments when she needs to do things on her own.

When you love her, you realize that she is not perfect. Your beloved is far from being perfect. But when you are under the trance of being in love you see no fault nor blemish. But when the hype is gone it leads to confusion. You felt out of love. But love is the deliberate decision to stay despite all the imperfections.

When you love her, jealousy is a foreign emotion for you. Trust is never an issue. You let her be. You let her explore. You are not holding her back because of jealousy. You know that you are simply giving back the trust that she has for you.

When you love her, you do not always put your best foot forward. You do not have the need to show off. You are not afraid nor ashamed of your flaws. There is a knowing inside you that she accepts every bit of your being. You give her the freedom to love you just as a man without superhuman expectations.

When you love her, you do not try to love her, you do not prove you love her, you just simply love her. You recognized that she is a mirror to your soul. It offers no resistance; it feels right, it simply is the manifestation of the nature of your soul.

When you love her, remember that you don’t get the relationship that you want instead, you get the relationship that you made yourself ready for.
[Photo credits to pexel.com]

An open Letter to my future Bride


May this open letter give justice to what my soul longs to articulate. May it give life to the language of love as it navigates its way to your heart.

Happiness is dancing in the rhythm of your soul. That is why I encourage you to fill your life with experiences that will nourish your inner being. I urge you to be whole in the love of God. I know life may throw a different game at you, and I am sorry for not being there (yet). But take heart and grow in faith. Let us find our path towards maturity that we may never rely on each other for validation. Neither you nor I can complete each other for in the love of Christ; We are already made whole.

Your absence no longer causes me sadness because I know we are on the same path of equally desiring to meet each other. I know we are at this stage of curiously knowing ourselves in search for spiritual, emotional, and financial maturity until the day when the universe conspires to make our souls meet. I don’t know when or how but when that day comes our souls will recognize each other and will communicate in a language only our souls can understand. And then we will never bother asking why it took so long because the only thing that matters is that – it was all worth it.

If we have already met, I would like to apologize for drifting away from the kind of man you deserve. But let us keep on trusting. The hand that authored great love stories will sure have our paths cross again, and it will be different. Our souls will finally find that hiding place in God’s hand. From then on we will experience the fullness of life, in all seasons, while turning the chapters of the book of life, together.

All of our life experiences will lead to this moment of resonance – when our souls vibrate in the same level of being where God is the sustenance. When we can love freely and give one another the empowerment to be the best version of ourselves. Then, and only then, we can genuinely dance in the rhythm of our soul.

So this is my prayer: that our love will flourish and that we will not only love much but well. Learn to love appropriately. We need to use our head and test our feelings so that our love is sincere and intelligent, not sentimental gush.

– Philippians 1:9-10

[Photo credits to pexel.com]

It is sad to be alone

They said it is sad to be alone,

let me count the reasons why…

When I am alone I write,

and my dream blog shed some light.

When I am alone I dance,

and my body undergone a trance.

When I am alone I pray,

and sing worships all day.

When I am alone I travel,

and I am now a backpacker.

When I am alone I draw,

and the pastel became my law.

When I am alone I read,

and inspiration is the new greed.

When I am alone I play guitar,

and the strings pluck a melodious war.

They said it is sad to be alone,

But that statement is only true,

When I am alone and I think of you.

Onesided beating

One sided beating.jpg

A conflict between heart and mind
A love that is destined to die
A memory of my own demise
Am I yours? Are you mine?

A moon dust of unknown origin
A wish on every bit of grain
A whisper on a silent breeze
A prayer on every drop of tears

A man praying for his woman
A woman who’s love is no where to be found
A feeling that seems older than time
A story that’s gone out of line

An eye of creature of the night
A hunting on a broad daylight
A sea that’s slowly rotting
A love that is one sided beating